Buck don’t get that, but he don’t question the ways of crazy old black men. It’s a personal rule, and it do serve him well.

“Sweaty whiteboys smell like a closet of ham.”

Lem been suggesting they ‘trade off’ — that meant they both slurp upon each other’s knobs. It sounded narsty to Buck. He’d rather jack his own self off. Buck done made it clear he don’t admire to do that. He don’t wanna taste Lem’s old-homeboy dick. Lem steady went on ’bout it, slapping his limpness ‘tween his ropy thighs.
Supposably, black boys be doing it in prison.
“T’ain’t no thang, Buckums! You just gotsta focus on yo’ own meat steada yo’ mouf! You eat pussy! Ain’t no d’rent dan eatin’ pussy!” Lem don’t eat pussy. He do say it demeans a nigga. Buck’ll lick a female, no problem. Buck got no compinktions ’bout a pussy.
If’n Lem gets drunk ’nuff, he will lick a bitch’s asshole. Buck don’t get that, but he don’t question the ways of crazy old black men. It’s a personal rule, and it do serve him well.
As Lem went on and on like some crackhead’s crackhead uncle, Buck began his workout. He did push-ups, counting hisself off, and his broad shoulders sweated out, wafting his manhood into they dead-end. Eventually he dropped off his jeans and continued his push-ups in his drawers. He weared tight-whites, his asshair peeking round the frayed edges. The fabric was soaked up by the small of his back and his taint, wet ’nuff to be transparent.
“You stink, hillbilly,” Lem said with a harsh-eyed glare when Buck done finisht his push-ups. Buck ain’t respond. He just rested upon his belly ’til he was ready, then he rolled o’er onto his back, his drawers’s poucha fat balls jiggling to a rest ‘tween his legs. Lem put out a frown. “Sweaty whiteboys smell like a closet of ham.”

From Buck on Bottom

Lem blamed the Haitians, cuz they was like that and cuz he was like that.

After that, the convo turned to who was suspected of being the rig thief, cuz that was the hot topic of the moment. Somebody was stealing shit outta personal effects, and it was causing ripples all over the rig. Lem blamed the Haitians, cuz they was like that and cuz he was like that. Steel got similar notions about this Argentinian girl-sniffer, and Petrov suggestified one of his own Russians might could be behind it. Only a Russian would blame one of they own.

After that, the convo turned to who was suspected of being the rig thief, cuz that was the hot topic of the moment. Somebody was stealing shit outta personal effects, and it was causing ripples all over the rig. Lem blamed the Haitians, cuz they was like that and cuz he was like that. Steel got similar notions about this Argentinian girl-sniffer, and Petrov suggestified one of his own Russians might could be behind it. Only a Russian would blame one of they own.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

You lick a ho pussy? You eat a nigga nut up!

“Which one you lookin’ at?” Lem turned the magazine around, so now Steel was looking at the female Lem was looking at a second ago and vice versa. Lem sucked on his teeth. “This bitch got a played-out pussy. You can tell.”

“Which one you lookin’ at?” Lem turned the magazine around, so now Steel was looking at the female Lem was looking at a second ago and vice versa. Lem sucked on his teeth. “This bitch got a played-out pussy. You can tell.”
“Can’t even see her pussy, Lem-“
“A nigga can tell!” Lem snapped. He glared at Steel. “I’d still fuck her. But I’d hafta work at it to make her cum. I wouldn’t lick her pussy neither. Nuh-uh. Not a bitch like that.”

“I’ll lick any white bitch pussy,” Steel said.
Lem looked at him like he was crazy. “What the fuck is wrong wit’choo? You prolly got white-ho-pussy brain, cuz you ate out so many bitches you got a pussy in yo’ skull in place of the brain. You lick a ho pussy? You eat a nigga nut up!”

From Steel the Roughneck

Haitians

“Girlshit on yo’ dingdong, whiteboy, you is so wrong!”

Soon as Buck got to relaxing — putting out ignore ’bout Lem’s nonsense — he got tired of sitting. He put on a clean paira tight-whites and got up to work out. He jogged in place some, then did couple burpees and went thru his routine, while Lem ranted like a old black man.
“Bet it was the Haitians. Bet it. Know that, Buckums! Reagan be lettin’ ’em in left ‘nd right, lettin’ ’em in like pants! Mark my words, them Haitians done touch all my shit. You don’t believe me? I got the receipts, homeboy!”

“I ain’t a homeboy. I believes ya, Lem, Hayshuns do that, they do be like that,” Buck said, voice jiggling up and down with the heft of his chest as he did his burpees — jumping up from the floor to the stool and back again. The pouch of his tight-whites flopped up and down, and his cock popped free. “They’s one of you’uns, you should tell ’em-” Buck grinned at Lem and kept on his burpees, despite his fatty shaft barrumphing up along with his movement. Lem done emphasize numerable times that ‘Haitians ain’t proper niggas’, and sh’ore ’nuff, Buck’s comment set him off once again.

“Girlshit on yo’ dingdong, whiteboy, you is so wrong! First of all, Haitians ain’t proper niggas, I done tol’ you that. Secondmostly, these Haitians in particular, on this rig, they done — they’s racist ‘gainst American niggas, Buckums, you know that. I know you know that! Lord ‘ave mercy! And fourthly or maybe fifthly, I dunno, them’s got knives — they come from a land of cannibals, Buckums — believe that, nigga! You believe that-” He wagged a finger at Buck, who was finishing his burpees. Then he cleared out some space ‘neath a pull-up bar. “They’s French niggas, that’s diff’rent ‘an American black fellahs. Them’s longskin, you know ’bout longskin niggas?”
“I don’t care, Lem.”

“They’s different from nightcheek niggas, you know.” Lem got a whole classifiction of homeboys — nightcheeks, longskins, redbones, high yellows, duckydoos. Buck got no time fer that.
Buck gripped the pull-up bar and lifted his feet off the floor. Buck was so tall he hadta angle his feet out in order to do any pull-ups. His damn near seven-foot-tall body nearabout reached the ceiling here.

“Lem, t’is my God-given right as a white man to not learn all the diff’rent kinds of black guys.” He did a couple pull-ups while Lem lit a cigarette and fumed.
“Firstly, Haitians do that voodoo shit-” Lem started counting off upon his fingers again, having forgetted he was already counting. “They do that, they sacrifice chickens an’ all.”

From Buck on the Oil Rig

Egyptians

One them said he was from Abba-dabba-doo, and that was from the fucking Flinstones. Lem know when a A-rab is pulling his leg, cuz it’s attached to this nigga brain.

It was Assif and couple them other Arab fellers — the Egyptians. They wasn’t actually all Egyptian, but Assif was and buncha others was, and Lem and Buck ain’t care about the particulars beyond that. One them said he was from Abba-dabba-doo, and that was from the fucking Flinstones. Lem know when a A-rab is pulling his leg, cuz it’s attached to this nigga brain.

From Buck on the Oil Rig

Africa was the Garden of Eden till the white man came

At least that prison cell ain’t got no honkies at that time.
Couple honkies did come later, and naturally they be stirring up all kinda conflict, as a honky do, Lord have mercy!

At least that prison cell ain’t got no honkies at that time.
Couple honkies did come later, and naturally they be stirring up all kinda conflict, as a honky do, Lord have mercy!
Buck do bug his mug about that. Yes, they do, honkies provoke fights, every time. Africa was the Garden of Eden till the white man came. All was perfection, then the Devil invented the white man in a cave in Ukraine. That’s in the Bible. Lem gotta wait for Buck to quit wigging out so Lem can finish his story proper-like.

From Buck on the Oil Rig