MN Manmacker's mansploitation
That’s prolly why they’s white, they ain’t notice the line to get in to be borned a nigga.
All that time, Mucker ain’t seem to notice Steel got one hand in his pants. Whiteboys don’t notice nothing, it’s crazy. That’s prolly why they’s white, they ain’t notice the line to get in to be borned a nigga.
Drunkie-doorights stay complaining! The only cure for that is more sobriety!
Steel let the whine bounce off him like wine — bouncy wine — if wine bounced — okay, that wordplay maybe don’t work, but Steel don’t let it bother him. Drunkie-doorights stay complaining! The only cure for that is more sobriety! And Christ!
He done inquisit regarding Mucker’s so-called friends, who was parta the “skater scene”. Also, Steel learned about the skater scene.
It sounded like a buncha drinky-dinky whiteboys to Steel, most likely druggie-do-’ems too, but Mucker assured him that that was not a necessary parta “the scene”.
Steel droned on about the importance of having safe and healthy hobbies to do with your safe and healthy friends. He done inquisit regarding Mucker’s so-called friends, who was parta the “skater scene”. Also, Steel learned about the skater scene.
It sounded like a buncha drinky-dinky whiteboys to Steel, most likely druggie-do-’ems too, but Mucker assured him that that was not a necessary parta “the scene”. Lotta ’em are straight-edge, Mucker said. Also, Steel learned about “straight-edge”. Damn, there’s lotta kinds of whiteboys out there! They don’t teach that in schools! A nigga only learn it on the streets!
On the skateboard of sobriety, I’mma be yo’, uh… wheels, I guess — I dunno how skateboards work.
Mucker struggled to sit up. “Look, man, I only agreed to go to AA cuz I gotta get the judge off my back.” Them whiteboy chest muscles was streaked with sweat.
“Uh-huh. Oldest story in the book,” Steel said. “Moses said the same thing!” He picked up the skateboard beside the mattress. “You a skateboarder?”
“Can’t hide anything from you.”
“Well, on the skateboard of sobriety, I’mma be yo’, uh… wheels, I guess — I dunno how skateboards work,” Steel said. He poked Mucker in the meat of his back.
“You got the hang of it.”
“That means I might keep moving even when you wanna stop-“
“Yep, that’s how skateboards work.”
“Cuz that is how you get from where you is to where you wanna be. The skate park of sobriety!” Steel said.
“Bottles all ovuh, hallelujah! Only Jaysus can pick up aftuh me! Oh Lord hallelujah! Lord gimme strength to see! With eyes of knowin’!”
“You ain’t done quit. You is drunk right now, numbnut!” Steel wagged his finger at Mucker and gestured to the circle of empties all around. “You done lost a battle! This is a war, Mucker Talleus, and yo’ forces is surrounded by enemy soldiers! They’s comin’ at’choo wit’ the whites of they eyes! I sees it wit’ my ever-belovin’ eyeballs. Let he with eyes do see!” Steel stood and did a little having-eyes dance, which Mucker ignored. Mucker tried hard to pass out drunk again, but he was neither tired nor drunk. Steel’s dance turned into an impromptu gospel song, which he sung repeating his words. “Bottles all ovuh, hallelujah! Only Jaysus can pick up aftuh me! Oh Lord hallelujah! Lord gimme strength to see! With eyes of knowin’!”
Mucker is a hardcore punk.
Steel & the Whiteboy Skater: Mucker has gotta quit drinking! That means AA meetings and working with his sponsor Winston Steel, who’s got some “interesting” ideas about how to motivate a drunk to quit. He’ll drill sobriety into Mucker one way or another! Can Mucker handle Steel’s brand of man-on-man hijinks?!
Descriptions
Mucker was a long and thickly built sumbitch, muscles like a refrigerator, not a fat slob like Steel was expecting. He got a big floppy mess of whiteboy hair.
A punk-rocker-type named Mucker, who talked like he swallowed an ashtray and had dyed-platinum hair styled in a mohawk. His voice was all gravel and low rumbles. Mucker was a tall, well-muscled man with anarchy tattoos peeking out from under his clothes, extending up his neck to his jaw and down his wrist to his fingers. He was in his mid-thirties, with a rough, craggy face, perpetual scruff on his chin, and a deep scowl.
Pictures
Mucker has gotta quit drinking! That means AA meetings and working with his sponsor Winston Steel, who’s got some “interesting” ideas about how to motivate a drunk to quit. He’ll drill sobriety into Mucker one way or another!
Can Mucker handle Steel’s brand of man-on-man hijinks?!
