MN Manmacker's mansploitation
American barbecue tasted wrong if cooked by a clean man or any kind of woman.
Big Eddie’s shoulders were soaked in sweat and splattered in grease, his armpits dense with coarse black hairs that seemed ready to — “fittin’ to” — burst out like an untended garden. His arm muscles were massive and both fleshy and firm, and his thigh were as thick as trees. It seemed hardly sanitary for such a man to prepare victuals, but American barbecue tasted wrong if cooked by a clean man or any kind of woman.
T’was Buck’s turn to snort like a jaded pony and make a masturbatory hand gesture.
T’was Buck’s turn to snort like a jaded pony and make a masturbatory hand gesture, which combined to signify his belief in the mutability of socially constructed roles qua the fulfillment of incumbent sociocultural systems and functions, strength and dominance as determiners per se of masculine hierarchies and the civilizational sine qua non of a peremptory conception of so-called manhood to staunch the onslaught of Leviathan.
From Buck the Dumbass
A man shouldn’t drink in a place with a cartoon mascot, Tyrell thought, eyeing the big-eyed giraffe on the wall.
A man shouldn’t drink in a place with a cartoon mascot, Tyrell thought, eyeing the big-eyed giraffe on the wall.
The bartender was an old lady, not even a proper bartender neither, Tyrell thought.
From Tyrell the Mandingo
Bill was all about erections — he said a man shouldn’t be guided by lust, and jacking off too much was being guided by lust.
Bill’s hand delicately wrapped around Thumper’s shaft. He ain’t stroke it, he just held it light as a egg, and Thumper slowly rubbed his dick back and forth to hump his hand.
Bill gulped and closed his eyes, then he stepped away from Thumper. “No. You’re not… you don’t have a complete erection, so…”
Bill was all about erections — he said a man shouldn’t be guided by lust, and jacking off too much was being guided by lust; “too much”, he said, meant getting yourself hard deliberately. Jacking off was only okay if you got hard accidentally and needed to do it to “relieve an erection”.
Mormons is crazy, yo.
From Thumper on Parole
A real man handled his shit and ain’t avoid a fight from a bigger man, Buck do say. He knew that was easy for him to say, as he was the bigger man in every interaction. But still, a man shouldn’t run.
Buck had no idea that Kareem was avoiding him and Lem — if he knew, he’d have told Kareem that was a rank pussy move.
A real man handled his shit and ain’t avoid a fight from a bigger man, Buck do say.
He knew that was easy for him to say, as he was the bigger man in every interaction. But still, a man shouldn’t run. Kareem should just get tougher, if his bootyhole hurts too bad.
From Buck the Roughneck
A man shouldn’t tear up over a female, not even his daughter. What kinda bullshit is that?
Davon shrugged, chuckled quietly to himself and puffed on his blunt. “She busy. She don’t got time for no daddy.”
The man sniffled like he was crying. What a fuckin’ pansy, Davon thought but ain’t say. He blew weed smoke in the man’s face. A man shouldn’t tear up over a female, not even his daughter. What kinda bullshit is that? If Davon had a daughter, he wouldn’t let her get gangbanged by niggas. Once she did though… ain’t no point in worrying about it. What’s done is done. Let her get on with her heroin and her played-out snatch. She won’t get less played-out over time.
From Omar the Muslim
Mr. Gregarian only wanted his daughter Miriam to live up to the expectations of Armenian Orthodox Christianity. He wanted his sons to pretend to.
Mr. Gregarian wanted his children to go to church, to follow the priest’s diktats, to live up to scripture. That meant no premarital sex or even kissing. Mr. Gregarian said that was how he wanted his boys raised. But Simon’s older brother Haykh had been fucking women since high school.
A man should fuck women before marriage. He should feel bad about it, he should keep it from his parents, he should hide it from polite society, but he should be too amative to resist. That was a proper man. Mr. Gregarian only wanted his daughter Miriam to live up to the expectations of Armenian Orthodox Christianity. He wanted his sons to pretend to.
From Rocky the Bouncer
Mr. Gregarian wanted Simon to go to church and to learn that pre-marital sex was wrong, and he wanted Simon to believe in all that stuff. But he wanted Simon to fuck a broad.
“But uh, you gotta — you gotta find a female, ya daddy want you to have a girlfriend,” Buck said.
Simon stopped with Buck’s dong throbbing on his face. He looked up at Buck. “What about them? Kendra and Caroline. They’re my friends,” he said.
“Yeah, but they’s rank bitches. They ain’t Armenian. You don’t fuck ’em-“
“I’m not married to them! I’m not supposed to fuck them,” Simon said, blushing. “That’s a sin! I go to church!”
“I know, but…” Buck couldn’t think of how to explain it. Mr. Gregarian wanted Simon to go to church and to learn that pre-marital sex was wrong, and he wanted Simon to believe in all that stuff.
But he wanted Simon to fuck a broad. A man shouldn’t be a virgin on his wedding day. He should be ashamed of himself for it, but he shouldn’t be a virgin anyway.
“Don’t let ya woman control you. She ain’t even ya woman, Smooches. You gettin’ distracted by potential skirt.”
Buck shrugged. “A man oughta choose his own way,” he said. “Don’t let ya woman control you. She ain’t even ya woman, Smooches. You gettin’ distracted by potential skirt.” Buck chuckled. Buck swung his hips left and right to make his foot-long slab slap against his thighs. He laughed like a kid at the slappity-thwack sound it made.
It is that fact that feels raw and acute in women of a certain age.
Women could only provide so much company before one craved the vitality of man.
Family is the agencement that catches communities and saves souls, and it is that fact that feels raw and acute in women of a certain age.
From Sasha & the Filthy Alphas of Texas