I got a good fifteen, twenty puhcent left to snack on.

Old lady pussy take awhile to get wet, but I got it goin’, got it goin’ good. Got her purrin’ like a mash potatuh, nigga.

“Her pussy is sweet as sunset, you don’t even know.” Thumper wolf-whistled as they both laughed. “Niggas, y’all is some silly pups, you know nothin’. Nothin’. She put out all I want. I stuck it up her backside two times last night. And I was licking that pussy fo’ hours. Ain’t even finish the whole pussy, I’s savin’ the rest fo’ latuh. I got a good fifteen, twenty puhcent left to snack on.” Thumper leaned forward, his rammy beard smelling like the unwashed parts of old ladies. His voice got a low growl. “Old lady pussy take awhile to get wet, but I got it goin’, got it goin’ good. Got her purrin’ like a mash potatuh, nigga.” His face was deadly serious. “I will lick any bitch’s pussy,” he said all defiant-like, as though he was making a stellar point. He held two fingers up to his mouth in a v-shape and licked the space between them. “Don’t care how ugly.”

From Thumper the Mover

A lightskin badonkadonk

Thumper seen niggas on fire less freaked out than she was, and her pussy snapped shut like a shy clam.

That lightskin badonkadonk Sherry made him stop over and over so she could do new facebooks and check up on her prior facebooks. Once she blueballed him cuz the computer voted down her facebook and put her in “facebook jail” for “subposting the truth about Mexican sluts” — Thumper seen niggas on fire less freaked out than she was, and her pussy snapped shut like a shy clam. After that she wasn’t hot no more to Thumper.

From Thumper the Booty Bandit

Bits of tits!

Most ’em was spilling bits of tits outta those stringy things.

They was pretty young things fresh outta high school — all legal age, but Thumper was old enough they felt too young to look at. Did girls get younger while he was locked up? He was them girls’ age when he got arrested, but they looked younger than he ever felt. Girls before ain’t look like girls now, he thunk. Most ’em was spilling bits of tits outta those stringy things. Mr. Gregarian musta ain’t never seen Miriam’s bikini or he’d-a blowed up.

From Thumper the Booty Bandit

She do booty, right?

He mimed eating a very big pot pie with a itty-bitty spoon.

“Lemme fuck yo’ guhl. Tell her to give up her booty if she bleedin’ outta her period. She do booty, right? Does she lick yo’ butthole? Cuz I will lick her’n. I will eat her asshole like a chicky pot pie.” He mimed eating a very big pot pie with a itty-bitty spoon.

From Thumper the Booter Bandit

Wigglin’ like a riddle

She made Thumper’s dick hurt, and her thighs made the hurt worth it.

“Which one you want?”
“That one ovuh there, wigglin’ like a riddle,” Thumper said without a second think. He let out a low-boil growl at the sight of her. She was a fancy-fine lightskin gal with a ripe badonkadonk and tits spilling outta her skimpy top. She made Thumper’s dick hurt, and her thighs made the hurt worth it.

From Thumper the Booter Bandit

Pussy as loose as free beer

She had a open-face pussy as loose as free beer and big bouncy titties you just knew she been letting mad niggas suck on.

She had a open-face pussy as loose as free beer and big bouncy titties you just knew she been letting mad niggas suck on. You could virtually see the trashy-nigga toothmarks around the tits. Most likely, she was one of Slim Jay’s hos. He always got girls on each arm, and they was usually kinda nasty. She cooed all slut-like, in a way that made Tyrell’s cock throb and ache.

From Tyrell the Ex-Con

It smelled like a old library

It was plump and wide but not loose and it went on and on just right. It smelled like a old library.

Caroline was pretty, or at least she ain’t ugly, but she had some acne (some of it on her face), and she was fat. Not fat in a good way but not fat in a awful way neither. She got a fat pussy, which Tyrell liked. It was plump and wide but not loose and it went on and on just right. It smelled like a old library.

Caroline was low-lipped and light-skinned, and her whole body jiggled like jello when Tyrell slammed his dick into her. Her eyes opened wide like her legs, like she ain’t never felt nothing so big inside her. She begged him to slow down, and he did, but then she begged him to speed up, and he did that too. He turned her clit up. She cried out with desire, and he filled her with his frothy jizz, until it dripped between her legs and soaked her mattress.

From Tyrell the Ex-Con

They was naturals too, a nigga could tell

Thumper been in prison cells smaller than them things.

Thumper’s dick was already part-hard cuzza all the females in the beauty salon. Some of them was slamming! There was one bitch in there with giant knockers, shit, Thumper been in prison cells smaller than them things. They was naturals too, a nigga could tell.

From Thumper the Bodyguard

Probably a honeycrisp

She was pretty hot — tits like those big apples — and she loved to suck dick.

All throughout the spring semester, Jimmy was dating this chick Elaine. She was pretty hot — tits like those big apples — and she loved to suck dick. She wouldn’t give up the pussy, she said she was saving herself. Seemed like bullshit to Jimmy, but he stayed true to her.

From The Alpha Jock & the Trustee