Author: MNManmacker

Ain’t nobody allowed to moo at Vagina-Candy.

Anyway, we’ll breeze past the next couple hours, cuz it was a buncha boredom, there was supper and some dumbass announcement from the warden — niggas was mooing at this prison guard named Vagina-Candy cuz he was Hindu and the rumor spread he couldn’t enforce a rule against nothing that moos, whenever Officer Vagina-Candy lead a line to mess or something, all them all, like hundreds of inmates just start mooing, and Vagina-Candy be freaking out and shit, Warden said it was a religious and ethnic diversity. Anyway, he acted like it was a fucking genocide. Warden get on the loudspeaker talking about the Holocaust and shit! Making all these rules! Ain’t nobody allowed to moo at Vagina-Candy. Warden gonna put people in solitary if they moo. Actually made a no-mooing rule. It’s prolly still in the rulebook.

Anyway, we’ll breeze past the next couple hours, cuz it was a buncha boredom, there was supper and some dumbass announcement from the warden — niggas was mooing at this prison guard named Vagina-Candy cuz he was Hindu and the rumor spread he couldn’t enforce a rule against nothing that moos, whenever Officer Vagina-Candy lead a line to mess or something, all them all, like hundreds of inmates just start mooing, and Vagina-Candy be freaking out and shit, Warden said it was a religious and ethnic diversity. Anyway, he acted like it was a fucking genocide. Warden get on the loudspeaker talking about the Holocaust and shit! Making all these rules! Ain’t nobody allowed to moo at Vagina-Candy. Warden gonna put people in solitary if they moo. Actually made a no-mooing rule. It’s prolly still in the rulebook.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

Anyway, she got nice tits.

he like to think he’d eat her out if she want, but he got a feeling Hindu bitches got nasty pussy so maybe not. If he could stomach the diversity, he would.

He picked up that pamphlet on curry respect, cuz he done saw there was a pretty lady in it, a curvy spicetip bitch. She was in the inside, wearing one them gauzy things in one image and in the other she dressed as a prison guard. It was obvious they’s the same photo, just with the clothes photoshopped. But she got a slamming body! Steel’d put it to her, and he like to think he’d eat her out if she want, but he got a feeling Hindu bitches got nasty pussy so maybe not. If he could stomach the diversity, he would.
Anyway, she got nice tits.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

That’s how they get ya, for every definition of “they” and “get” and “ya”

Anyway again, he did it again, and then again, cuz Whiteness pressured him into doing it a third time. And then Steel knew he was in a bad place. That’s how they get ya, for every definition of “they” and “get” and “ya”. A nigga be purporting he can say no right up until the moment he flap his lips. By then the line is way in his rear-view mirror.

Anyway again, he did it again, and then again, cuz Whiteness pressured him into doing it a third time. And then Steel knew he was in a bad place. That’s how they get ya, for every definition of “they” and “get” and “ya”. A nigga be purporting he can say no right up until the moment he flap his lips. By then the line is way in his rear-view mirror.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

The grass is always greener on the other side of a white man, that’s what Steel always says. He’d make a great cow.

Put a buncha white men together, they end up smelling like a loaf of bread slathered in mayonnaise and kept in a cool dark place

He went to the Aryan Way’s cell block, which smelled bad of honky armpits. Put a buncha white men together, they end up smelling like a loaf of bread slathered in mayonnaise and kept in a cool dark place

Whiteness called him nigger afronta all his white-ass buddies, but he called him Winston when they was alone. That gave Steel the shiver-his-timbers. He would prefer it if Whiteness called him nigger all the time. Him not saying it when they was alone made it clear he don’t give a shit about the color of a man’s skin. He’s just performatively racist, which is worse than real racism. Or maybe, if he did call Steel a nigger when they was alone, Steel would be thinking it’d be better if he don’t think that way in private. The grass is always greener on the other side of a white man, that’s what Steel always says. He’d make a great cow.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

you google it

She was built like a sexy skunk, like that French one, ass like a barrel of love, shit! Steel wanna dip his dingdong in that bitch like she the spicy mustard from McDonald’s, she got black hair with sorta curls, but not you know, and anyway, she talk like an angel, she got one them smooth country-girl voices, like you could just picture her reading poetry and riding a horse. Prolly not at the same time, that sounds difficult, but you know, on the same day anyway. Like in a “riding crop” maybe, Steel don’t know what that is and he’s too much in love to google it, you google it

He saw a white woman Saturday, fell madly in love with her, asked her out, she said yes, then he sent like thirty text messages, which apparently was “creepy” and “over the line” and she said it weren’t gonna work out, and she blocked him before he even composited together a response. Blocked him on the phone and on Facebook! Double whammy! She was built like a sexy skunk, like that French one, ass like a barrel of love, shit! Steel wanna dip his dingdong in that bitch like she the spicy mustard from McDonald’s, she got black hair with sorta curls, but not you know, and anyway, she talk like an angel, she got one them smooth country-girl voices, like you could just picture her reading poetry and riding a horse. Prolly not at the same time, that sounds difficult, but you know, on the same day anyway. Like in a “riding crop” maybe, Steel don’t know what that is and he’s too much in love to google it, you google it, but she dumped him just cuz he got long-winded with the texts, he wanna make sure she understand how pretty she is and how Steel felt cuz not many women make him feel like that, shit, she like a rail of coke, she do get a nigga started.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

Walsely “Whiteness” Dallyrimple

The grass is always greener on the other side of a white man, that’s what Steel always says. He’d make a great cow.

Whiteness called him nigger afronta all his white-ass buddies, but he called him Winston when they was alone. That gave Steel the shiver-his-timbers. He would prefer it if Whiteness called him nigger all the time. Him not saying it when they was alone made it clear he don’t give a shit about the color of a man’s skin. He’s just performatively racist, which is worse than real racism. Or maybe, if he did call Steel a nigger when they was alone, Steel would be thinking it’d be better if he don’t think that way in private. The grass is always greener on the other side of a white man, that’s what Steel always says. He’d make a great cow.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

Clits pee a tax tour, y’all!

You wanna hear something funny? Go find an episode of Masterchef, maybe season seven or eight or so, a young Chinese man fucks up. You will never hear anything funnier than a sobbing Chinaman attempting to say ‘crispy texture’, it’s hilarious. Clits pee a tax tour, y’all!

You wanna hear something funny? Go find an episode of Masterchef, maybe season seven or eight or so, a young Chinese man fucks up. You will never hear anything funnier than a sobbing Chinaman attempting to say ‘crispy texture’, it’s hilarious. Clits pee a tax tour, y’all!

From Winston Steel & the White Man

Wilmer Attickus

That’s when Wilmer came around. He was like fortyish, with a ragged head of salt and pepper hair — salty hair, lightly peppered — that was long like a hippie. He be looking like Willie Nelson, if Willie Nelson was a crackhead, which he prolly would be if he was like eighty years younger. He was short as a paira Daisy Dukes, swear to God, but he got muscles for days. Real compact muscles, like he was a much bigger honky but he got stuffed into a tiny honky suit.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

Every time like a watch.

Steel was still letting the demon of alcoholism haunt his brain, so he ain’t even conisder saying no. Addiction gonna put you in that position every single time. Every time! Every time like a watch.

Steel was still letting the demon of alcoholism haunt his brain, so he ain’t even conisder saying no. Addiction gonna put you in that position every single time. Every time! Every time like a watch.

From Winston Steel & the White Man

Officer Gayle “Awful” Auffernan

He was a pinkthumb honky, thick as all getup, face like a punched cranberry. He looked like he assembled his ugly mug by stealing all the ugliest parts from other uglier honkies, he mismatched, like if you took a parta every cracker and smushed ’em into one cracker — that’d be delicious, Steel do love crackers — if you never had the butter ones in the blue box, go get ’em now, they’s at the fancy store. Anyway, Auffernan was all jaw and shoulder, frowning his frown at Steel like he some kinda authority figure.

From Winston Steel & the White Man